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6 ways to uplift your feelings to happiness and joy

6 Ways to Uplift your Feelings to Happiness and Joy6 ways to JOY with mytantramassage.com.au

Feeling Alone or Lonely?

Although you may feel that you are all alone, and no one has ever felt like you feel or gone through what you feel, don’t worry about it. You are not alone. You are never alone. There is always someone there for you. To help you, comfort you, give you advice or whatever you need. You just have to ask.

I know it’s not easy to know that the person who is making you feel bad or lonely has ever experienced what you are going through. But they have. Sometimes that’s the way they show they care. The way they love you. And it’s the best they can do.

So here are 6 ways for you to change that lonely feeling. When you don’t want to be alone or when you are feeling sad and want to change your mood.

6 ways to change your feeling easily

  1. Help someone

The easiest way to change your mood, to feel connected, is to help someone else. Someone who is not as well off. Smile at someone. Help a friend or family member who is not as well off as you are. When you nurture another person, you nurture yourself and love your self more. It helps you feel better, relax and open your heart.

  1. Make someone laugh

Think of a joke or something that makes YOU laugh and feel happy. Ring or text a friend and make them smile or laugh. It makes you feel better too. When you smile and laugh it lifts the mood of everyone around you. Google jokes on your favourite subject!

Laughter Yoga is a good way to help you laugh – deliberately start laughing “Ho ho, ha ha ha, hee hee hee” and keep saying it out loud until you actually laugh and feel happy!!

  1. Connect with nature, an animal, tree or plant

Go outside and be with nature, an animal or even tree or plant. Take your shoes off and walk on the grass, feel the cool earth under your feet. Walk on the beach and wriggle your toes in the sand, feel the water wash over your hands or feet. Stroke or cuddle a cat or dog if there is a friendly one nearby. If you don’t have a real one, get a teddy bear to hug!

You could go to the park and hug a tree! People often talk to their plants and vegetables as they believer that helps them grow.

  1. Massage*

Book to receive a massage. This is a lovely way to pamper your self, be touched and gently stroked. Just relaxing lying on the massage table and allowing the masseuse or masseur will help you feel better about yourself. There are many different forms of massage which can relax, refresh and energise you to feel better about yourself and your body. They don’t have to be painful if you specifically ask for a Relaxing Massage*…

  1. Respectfully ask a person older than you

Ask older people how they used to feel when they were your age and going through what you are going through. They have great stories and good advice to help you. They’ve often made similar “mistakes” to you!

Remember to respect others and they will show respect to you in return.

  1. It’s a game

Try to think of this life of yours as a game – a very big game. Or a play, where you are acting or playing the best and most positive happy role you can. Change your perspective so you can find the fun in any dull or boring experience. It’s not about winning the game. It’s about playing it and having fun. And learning along the way. About yourself. About others.

 

I hope these 6 ways to happiness; 6 positive ideas have helped you feel better. Given you hope that other people (like me) get lonely too, and are thinking of you and sending you unconditional love as you read these words.

Ally

* I am a bit biased about massage, being a masseuse who loves to give gentle sensual relaxing massages – book here!

6 ways have a sensual Tantra massage to relax
It has been how long since you had a massage?
joy arises from within and a massage
Pleasure is always derived from something outside you whereas joy arises from within – Eckhart Tolle

 

Joyful feeling after Tantra massage with Ally
JOY drawing by Ally

 

 

Bali 2017

Bali Holiday, Meditation, Kundalini Yoga and NLP Retreat in June-July 2017

Ally’s Chill out relaxing Holiday in Northern Bali in JuneAlly in temple dress, Bali 2017

I had a relaxing holiday in Bali – first  3 days with my Balinese family at their home stay in northern Bali.

On the way to northern Bali I visited Besakih, the mother temple, which was built in the 8th Century. Jof drove us through delightful Balinese towns and countryside and cool lush green rainforest, and it was high up on the mountain, with a wonderful view. I got some incense, flowers and matches from local women for the offering. My guide was Wayan and he showed me around, took lots of photos of me all around the temple complex. When we finally got to the place where we could pray he indicated the lady priest (who had a Mickey Mouse t-shirt on with her sarong!)

I stayed with my Balinese sister Dewi and her family for 3 days to relax. While I was there, Dewi introduced me to her spiritual teacher, Jro Tapakan, who is a priest in her town. He had lived in USA so he spoke good English and we had an interesting talk about our common interests of healing and teaching.

I had a relaxing Balinese massage, pedicure and had flowers painted on my toenails, enjoyed the local seafood at local warungs (restaurants) and read my book in the sunshine. I was honoured to be invited to attend a Balinese ceremony at a local temple where the goddess Durga healed many people, including giving me a powerful healing energy boost!

I got up before dawn one morning to go out on a local fishing boat at Lovina to see the dolphins play. The sunrise was magnificent – saw the rays of the sun glorious over the island of Bali. Delighted in seeing a dolphin jump out of the water, turn a complete somersault and dive back in! That is engraved in my mind – it was too quick to take a photo!

When we got back to Lovina there were 3 gorgeously beautiful Balinese dancers, and I danced with 2 of them and also had my photo taken with them. I sketched one of the dancers.

Ally with Balinese dancers, Lovina, Bali 2017
Ally with Balinese dancers, Lovina, Bali 2017

Jof drove me to the Banjar Buddhist Temple. The last time I was there 2 yeas ago they were building a pagoda. It’s now finished – with pink lotus flowers around the base and a pond with waterlilies and dragon bridges to get inside. Inside was dedicated to the Goddess Quan Yin, goddess of compassion. Next we went to Banjar Hot Springs for a swim in the pool and lunch. I bought a lovely white lace kebayah at the market there.

Inner Growth Retreat Bali 29 June-6 July 2017

Dewi took me to Villa Boreh on Friday 30 June for 7 day Inner Growth Retreat – joining meditation, Kundalini Yoga and NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) in Tejakula on the northern coast of Bali. Unlimited massages were very welcome, and, l like the others on Retreat, I took advantage of them, having a Balinese or Aromatherapy massage nearly every day in the massage building surrounded with water fountains. The weather was warm and balmy, food organic and delicious, and I made some new friends of the participants on the Retreat who were all from South Australia.

Peter teaching in beautiful Seminar Room, Villa Boreh, Bali 2017
Peter teaching in beautiful Seminar Room, Villa Boreh, Bali 2017

Every day we got up at 6:30am quick shower and from 7am to 7:45 we did meditation with Peter; then Mardi led us to do Kundalini Yoga till 8:30am then we enjoyed breakfast. From 9:30am to 12:30pm we did powerful NLP processes. Ate healthy organic lunch outside in the sun at 1pm. We had some afternoons free and could have unlimited massages and beauty treatments (like coffee body scrubs). So every day for the first 3 days I had a one hour massage, and one day I had 1-1/2 hour massage! Then we had dinner by the sea at sunset at 6:15pm, then meditation from 7.30pm to about 8.30pm, then we all went to bed!

I enjoyed learning the different methods of meditation, however my legs ached so much which distracted me from meditating properly because I’m not used to sitting cross legged OR sitting still. Also I have a belief that stillness meditation is a male thing. The goddess energy has to move and flow like water… So the solution could be to get a foldup meditation stool. We did a couple of walking meditations as well, which I liked.

I liked the gentle movement and breathing of Mardi’s Kundalini Yoga – as long as I didn’t do too much energetic breathing, cos it made me too light headed!

The NLP processes, most of which I have done years ago, were focused on one area in the Wheel of Life that we wanted to work with. We looked at our values, negative emotions (and dissolved some of them), generative beliefs, limiting beliefs (and changed them [without telling others what they were]), goals and identities… and all came out with a positive result at the end… Very powerful and very healing.

Semkupal waterfalls

We also went to visit the Semkupal waterfalls, visited local salt works, a local weaver and indigo dyer and bought a lovely indigo dyed batik sarong. At the end of the Retreat we participated in a special Lantern ceremony on the beach.

The next day after our final morning and lunch, Dewi and her family picked me up to drive me to Sanur. That’s her Mum, Dad, cousin Ketut who drove the vehicle, nephew Marvin and her children Jivan and Ayu. The car was very quiet when we went over the mountain – everyone besides me and the driver were asleep! We stopped at Bas Coffee Plantation on the way to have coffee (even the children had coffee) and I bought some vanilla beans and turmeric. They took me to Sanur Beach and we took lots of photos of each other, then left me at my homestay. On my final day I had breakfast and then walked along Sanur Beach taking photos. Dewi and Ketut picked me up and took me to Krisna store to get some t-shirts and then to the airport.

I love Bas coffee plantation in Bali

So come and have a special “Balinese healing session” with me soon to warm up these cold winter days! Book now

Some drawings I have done in Bali:

5 Most Common Regrets of the Dying

This is pure gold. Read it now, while you’re still healthy. Read it slowly.

I do not know who wrote it, however there are some things we can do now…

– – – –

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal.

Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled.

Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret.

But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do.

And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming.

Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years.

There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away.

People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love.

Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice.  They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits.

The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content.

When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. 

Choose happiness.

Thank you to William for the lovely sunset photo 🙂